It wasn't that bad until I got home, bursting into tears when my mum's shouting almost tear the house down. Then I called HIPPO whom is expert at spraining her ankle to ask her where to go. The moment she said "It's very pain right," I knew she absolutely understand how I was feeling and I felt relieved for that.
I hopped around on my left foot the whole day on Wed. I didn't expect my X-ray result of my leg-ankle bone was so nice la! It was perfect man! Haha, I told my dad that after drinking so many cartons of milk all these years and if my bone still break, I might as well just vomit out all those milk. =.=
The doctor was very nice you know!!! and funny. First visit, he gave me 1MC for no-PE for 2 weeks, 1MC for no-shoes for 2 days. When I hopped to the door, he realised I couldn't even stand on my foot, he immediately signed me off to X ray. Second visit, he insisted on getting MC for 2 days. I told him I had msa and probably not allowed to re-take. He said "SAJC, it's very far from here right. You can't even walk! You shouldn't go at all! How come your school so weird? School reopen have exams already."
Deep down I was wishing he would go make a complain. Everything is so sui!! WS couldn't get what she wanted sooo much, Belle was so so much more unfortunate than me, and I wonder how is SM's phone. In addition, WS and I, you know, 'it' always happen around the same time. Home-study is difficult, I need a tutor/teacher to guide along.
Oh I want to thank a lot of people for accomanying me. Thanks mamaweiwen thanks Samuel and Chesed... I almost broke their arms! Thanks Shanny, SFC and so.. OH and Jiejie and dona, eh, same ppl HAHA, and rachel CHAN and YQ for welfare's job. =D And visitors and so la. Gosh, WS, your sunflower... my dad shorten it to 1/3 of it's original height la. Haha!
My foot now... well, there is a few patches of blue-blacks and even my toes have swollen. Picture that.
I really wonder what God wants me to learn from this or this is one of His plans... Especially... Today there is a meeting at GBHQ, a DI-meeting and I can't go.
WS was sorry that I did not get the chance to scold. Haha, don't have to. I never want to scold, I wish to know and reason and I want to do thing in God's ways. I never thought of wanting to say so much, like I say, God place you in a higher authority place in my life, I should obey. As for WS, well, she listens to God very closely when it comes to GB, which is why I never really VS her.
Likewise, I felt that you just want to win Gold medal. That is all you want. I never hear from you that you want to develop the girls, spiritually. Does winning a Gold medal raise our status in school higher? Possible. We may even get more girls coming in. That is good I agree but what is the purpose of getting more girls in? When you are not focusing on development of girls' walk with the Lord, the girls' wouldn't feel for the company, the more they will leave, unchanged. Getting more girls in is like asking them in and invite them for a slide game, they will quit where the slide ends which is soon..
Oh you said before to catch what I mean is like putting a puzzle together. Ok, read on.
We are now working so hard for Gold, just to grab a Gold medal. Shouldn't it, we has always been working hard, and our efforts are recognised as time goes? There is no value in getting a Gold medal when we plan our way out within a short time but there is value to show that we having been doing and thus, God recognised our effort.
It was a surprise. After this Papa Lord placed me in SFC, I thought of bringing God to GB through worship, I wished that the girls would catch the lyrics and understand. I want them to grow spiritually. God is beautiful, God is awesome. I want them to remember that.
I am speaking from my view, I never heard from you, I never discuss with you. You don't even want to share your thoughts. Are we too young for you? Too immature for you?
If you have reasons, from the Lord, I have nothing to say. Why is it that each time we want to talk to each other, it must be a unenviable task?
Now I know why XY complained that my post is very long.
To my dearest SM, how many times have I slept beside you? Or rather around you? Hahaha. And you have the tendency to have one hand coming out of your position but you didn't do that in the office. =D PI LOR... Haha, I just happen to SEE.
SIQI!HAHA, shh, it's ok what. Sitting on grass was perfectly normal. haha
I was in terrible foul mood before I read somebody's email. Haha. Why does people have send emails to me about their issues? SUPER WEIRD. Haha, but I like it that way too. lol.
It's my umpteen time cleaning my room. super irritating. I had to mumble to God asking Him to give me the perfect arrangement because I was about to explode. lol.
My parents are... they like to keep things which they think are usable and looked nice. All these things pile up and gets into my way, esp my room so I dumped everything into the bin conveniently. Want to bet? I am sure I will say HELL-O to these things tml morning. lol. OK I AM SUPER MEAN. and childish in that sense.
I can't study when things are not in place and I have no idea how to tidy up my room anymore. Do you remember us cleaning up rooms for 20 hours to finish our responsibility at home-badgework? I bet I can get 2 badges this year. lol.
Miss GB a lot. Everything I have learnt and done... I guess that's another reason why I return to GB. No CCAs can sub GB.
Drills. Can I be extremely open here? Well.
I want to praise ... Ok maybe I should email them or sth?! URGG. okok.
But I really want to tell somebody that she improved a lot a lot but I had to fail her for one reason. I feel terribly bad but that's how it is like and we got to face it. It pains me but I am not going to let it be just like that and I want her to stand up proud too.
ok. take it I am crapping here.
What I really learnt from this camp is how to teach juniors. 4 years in GB had taught me how to be a servant first, meaning, I learnt how to serve people, putting everyone before me. Me is the last in my prioty list. And now, I am a leader, a servant leader (GB's mission) so...
it's my girls' turn to serve me!
HOW AWKWARD! Haha. It's super weird. I am so used to serving them even though they are younger than me but I am supposed to ALLOW them to serve me. urgg. get a knife and stab me. lol.
They are so cute. seriously... when SiQi actually helped me to cook my noodles for dinner. I was like woah, I don't have to do anything at all! and I still get to eat and my junior is serving me!That kind of feeling is indescribable.
And how can I forget that my girls need to learn to serve too? I guess I am very slow to realise a lot of things. I am slow to realise, I am of a higher authority now. Not to put it in a blunt/rude way alright, no offense. I am just trying to say, I now recognise that every actions I make, should be different now. ok, nvm... I am getting confused over what I am writing but I get what I mean. Haha. Do you? I doubt.
Somebody complained that my previous post was too short. Ok. Here I am to extend it further, happy? (to that girl whose email has the word happy. lol. I think everyone will know who are you)
I stopped at the Botanics part. We got back to school and it was time for the girls to learn T-shirt making from 1700-1900. WS,SM and I grabbed the chance to first, cut hair, second bring towels and slippers. Haha, none if that agenda is mine, but I went on with them.
Ok, we rushed our way back to Limbang to get dinner and when we got to school, the girls needed more time. Aiyo, I even had the time to arrange the packets neatly with the spoons and prepared the drinks. Tsk. lol. Straight after that, the girls were even a time to rest for a while before we started doing drills. (oh I have a lot to comment about drills)
Then after that, it was the night activity! Haha. Initially, SM and Si Qi were allocated to be at D&T block area, which IS the scariest and spookiest of all. WS and I were supposed to go to the hall. Haha, and we thought we would laugh out loud and crapped too much before the girls came. Ha, then we changed so SM came with me to the hall. The challenge at the hall was for the girls to blow out 12 candles in the middle of the hall. It would be scarier if we out it at the stage.
Haiya. SM and I hid behind this entrance wall and yakked. Drug Addict and Lee JinYan were so bored that they came to talk to us. While SM and I were hearing screamings and laughters from the D&T block and canteen toilet, we heard BOYS' voices. Both of us were so surprised. Haha, then a sir came into the hall haha... so the BB came back from something. Haha. Scare us.
The girls screamed loudly at the staircase then they came closer to us. SM and I planned carefully to scare them by SM roaring first and me screaming. To our ulmost disappointment, they came in laughing. -.- Xin Ying was SUPER HIGH! well, explain to you later. blah blah. The seniors went to the classroom supposedly the final scary area, and SM suggested I climbed out of the tables. HEY THAT FREAKS ME OUT! lol. In the end I accidently molested my junior Wen Lin, I AM SO SORRY!!! Haha. Ok.
That's all for first day I supposed. Our reflection sessions? Haha. Awesome!
Ok. WS insisted to have the camp com to debrief at the end of the day so the girls went to bath first. Lights off at 1215. The 3 of us waited for the sec4s and sec3s to finish bathing while we were still smelly. My gosh. They finished bathing but it took them ages to come out and meet us. Better still, the camp commandent was blur and funny. lol. By the time the 3 of us finished bathing it was 1am or something.
Oh ya, must talk about this. I was doing facial at the basin, lol, ok, applying the facial cleanser when XXX and Siew Yi came in! ARH! They saw my white forehead! LOL! They wanted to ask me about the breakfast for the second day and they didn't mind waiting for me to finish washing my face but I insisted them to carry on. Guess what? My facial cleanser is the leave-cool-feeling type so when they left, I almost got a cold! lol! It was super cold and I thought the cleanser kinda harden on my face. LOL.
SM had to finish her proposal while WS and I tried to finish the video. Crap. I don't know how, everytime when night come, both of us can go lamey high. Alright, SOK, here's for you. WS was super lazy and didn't want to take out her sleeping bag but I was so cold! The office's floor was freezing so I opened yours and used it as blanket. =D OH I FORGOT. There was something pretty funny. My laptop didn't had enough battery so I just found an empty plug and used it. Then WS said we need the net, so I just found one modem that is not connected and used it! HAHA! All without permission but hey, I just found them lying around...
Haha. Second day, wow, we woke up at 7am and I found SM sleeping on the floor in her usual side-way sleeping manner and we went to wash up. Am I getting naggy? Because I am lazy to talk about the second day. Alright, there were drills, lunch, games, drills, theory test, field cooking, drill tests, special night, NOT TO MENTION I SEE ZOEY AGAIN!!! Okok.
Extend this post. Second day breakfast! What happened? Oh the girls did their morning PT but they still looked so dead. Aiyo. Did I get theresa and weeping to make orange juice? Haha, they looked so cute learning. Anyway, WS taught XXX how to use can-opener. It really amazed me, I dont know how to describe that feeling.
We went to basketball court to teach the girls how to pitch tents. Woah, my group was like superb, they built up and tear it down within 8 minutes! Not bad. That's what I thought at first. BUT, when the 3 of us had to complete against the sec1s, we realised that the tent the other group used had very loose poles. No wonder. lol. yadayada.
Then we had drills, it was so troublesome because... I had to teach stage 1&2 at the same time! AND AND, all of them wanted so much prac! urgg. I really have a lot to say about drills. Lunch, Miss Leong told SM and I that we need 2 people to open the gate and apparently, we had to figure out ourselves why we must stand on the left of the gate etc if not, we would open it by force and spoil our ear drums. It started raining when we were on our way back. heavily and when we got out of Limbang, it drizzled! THANK GOD! Haha then we made our way back for lunch. blah blah.
DRILLS was bordeom and I could see the girls were dreading, at least I WAS so I requested for games. INDEED, the girls instantly got so high over the game turn over a new leaf. Ha, and they challenged to get 11 ppl on this groudsheet and flipped it. They failed several times despite having us around to hold them but they pushed on. I was really awed by their perserverance.
Blah Blah. So many things to say, I don't think I want to put up here. Oh ya, I finally know why need 2 people to open the gate. The rod has to go through holes on each side of the gate. Apparently, one gate went lower so, you need to step on the other to made the hole go lower. When I had to leave the school, I stood on the gate with 2 legs and I was still too light to make the gate go lower! SO FRUSTRATING! I NEED TO EAT MORE! HAHA. This post is super duper long.
I am back from GB camp!!! lol. (not to mention I was back last night and I slept for 13 hours straight.)
Haha. There are simply too many things happening in this camp for me to reflect about. It would easily take me about 6-7 pages of microsoft word to just focus on the activities and not about what I've learnt.
Let's take a look on the first day of the camp. WS had to come over to my house to help me because I need to bring my zinc bag, shoe bag, uniform, laptop and 3 bags of food. Though SM's mum cooked 3 packets of Beehoons, we were still worried that we didn't had enough so we went on to Limbang and got 5 more packets.
While the girls had devotion in the class, WS, SM and I tried to pok holes and finish up the puzzles.
On the way to botanic gardens, I realised I forgot to bring the clues and I confessed that. Haha, WS gasped and her mouth were opened wide. Then we decided to use my phone to send the clues to them. Ha.
When we reached that area and prepared to eat Bee Hoon, we realised, we forgot to bring plates and deal with it by using aluminium foils as plates. Thankfully the girls didn't mind.
Admist playing games, WS realised she forgot to bring along the balloons. Haha. Die so she quickly called Pastor Ben for help.
SEE?! SO MANY LOOPHOLES!
The girls went on to do their challenges to get the clue and it was hilarious! Especially the girls who had to sing and talk to the fishes in the pond. Haha! And Cindy's group had to wear several watches on their wrists and asked for time. Oh my gosh. lol.
After gotten their clues, the girls were supposed to go to their destination and take video. WS and I predicted they would take an hour, which would buy us time to go around and throw their next clue. To our ulmost surprise, on our way to put their next clues, we met them! They finished their video within 15 minutes! ha, my gosh.
It was so embarassing yet funny.
We kept the girls waiting in their area and always get them to call us. In between, the 3 old seniors kept calling each other to think of the next step. Haha.
It was so terrible but we managed to salvage everything and the girls didn't really found out! Amazing! Thank God. haha. Really thank God.
We had this balloon and sticker game whereby X from row A have to guess the right sticker on another person in rowB. And if X got it right, the person who got the sticker will have her ballon burst above her head. Note that the balloon is filled with powder.
It was crazy. The girls were like super excited to see each other getting that treatment.
ha, but the thing which we expected the least was... the girls started to stick stickers all over their puzzles. (with their names on). OH MY GOSH. WS and I was super shocked la! LOL. I wondered what SM thought of it. Hah. My gosh... I meant it, all over. And the variety? ranging from hellokitty-tweety bird.
lol.
ZOEY IS SO CUTE! Haha alright. There was once, her third bro went behind her, and hugged her from the back! ARH! SO CUTE! Zoey is turning 4 next Jan and Ephem is turning 2.
Don't rmb much. I still remembered drug addict refused to entertain me on the rainforest trail. urgg. lol. And I couldn't stop asking her to. so tao ren yan la. And she really thought I was talking to myself when I was actually talking to Jin Yan. ARH!! DRUG ADDICT!!! arh, I don't practice my skill of talking to myself that often ok?! lol
Oh, I will post pictures and videos on GB50th blog. Do take a look. haha.
That's all for Botanics. (I mean, there are definitely more but I am too old to let my fingers tire out)
We came back. post abt the rest some days later.
Oh how about class outing?! I own you! arh. wait la. lol.
the sense of uncertainty and insecurity is terrible. damn it. I worry but I can't do anything. Should I make a trip down to Kovan? So what if I got the badge and assessment sheet? I didn't get the card! My gosh. Freak! Freak! Scares the whatever it is out of me. Pardon me. And the worse thing is I have no contacts.
Ironic. Watching Coffin in tomorrow morning to scare myself. so much for PW outing. Haha.
disturbed. very.
next up. it's very very difficult for me to give up on relationships. I know I need to move on and just forget about them but, somehow, the strings are there and they are pulling me. well. maybe I should stop poking my nose into her life or even read her blog. all the better. one person less to border about. sounds very, emotional isn't it. well, I am not use to breaking friendships. If I have, they must be deary to me. Ha. oh well, I haven't bathe if you realise. lol. WTH! I THINK I AM FREAKING, tomboyish. Haha. alright. I am so not going to edit this post.
I am sooo addicted to playing something which is detrimental to my fingers, I should stop soon.
To prevent yourself from getting tempted, stay away from it.
I learnt a lot from GB today and I really want to share it.
WS shared about parents while Pastor Ben shared about an eye for an eye from Matthew5:38-42
38"You have heard that it was said,'An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.' 39But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also. 40And if anyone would sue you and take your tunic, let him have your cloak as well. 41And if anyone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles. 42 Give to the one who begs from you, and do not refuse the one who would borrow from you.
We talked about if you never forgive, it will never end and you will always stay in bitterness.
Pastor Ben shared this story which I hope it's not wrong to talk about it here. Hm.
A mission family: Husband, Wife, Son, Daugther
The group of villagers captured this husband and son, burnt them in front of the wife and daugther. Some people asked the authorites to take action so 7 people were sued.
And this wife said to the press "drop the charges". To her, she thinks that if God has forgiven us as sinners, what right do we have to not forgive others? Moreover, God loves us and God loves the villagers.
The villages didn't share the same perspective. you get what I mean? so ya.
No wonder I just received an email yesterday. It's happening until now at Orissa. Search it.
And then Jesus Others You
Reaction VS respond reaction: immediate respond: step back, take time, think, act
Of course, I am one who always react first, for the fun of it. In times I respond but I think it is changing into habit soon. Thank God for reminding me sometimes, I go wild, I need to stop asap because that becomes my character too.
And what else? Oh about parents... Although the guy don't mind but I don't think I am going to share his story here. Anyway, this guy just face terrible family problems and ha, actually my friend said this to me before but today I am hearing it again.
It's something like parents are learning to be one and we should communicate to let them know us better too. And it takes time to build friendship, what's more about building family bond.
They may see things from their perspective and refuse to change but... they like us, are learning.
It may seem like an obvious thing to do or you know, all of us know it but I guess it's time to let it sink in.
Oh Lord You’ve searched me You know my way Even when I fail You I know You love me
Your holy presence Surrounding me In every season I know You love me I know You love me
At the cross I bow my knee Where Your blood was she'd for me There’s no greater love than this You have overcome the grave Your glory fills the highest place What can separate me now
You go before me You shield my way Your hand upholds me I know You love me
You tore the veil You made a way When You said that it is done
And when the earth fades Falls from my eyes And You stand before me I know You love me I know You love me
It was a terrible weekend other than going SM's house. I wrote down what I want, desire VS what God wants.
Realisation came upon me that I have been walking unsteadily this year because I didn't know what I want so I have no idea what to do. It was a mixture of what I want and what God wants.
It was amazing to see how God's desires is really cohesive. Ok, not a very good word.
I listened to another recording and this pastor said something which caught my attention. (I was reading times.) He said: It is not you who have the strength to hold on to His hands. It is Him who hold yours. And once He holds yours, He will never let go!
Wow. I was amazed by that which once again reminded me that it is not based on my desire or my will to come upon this place where I really have to surrender.
Meanwhile, I hate to lose. Ha.
And the pastor said: didn't take the step because we want to escape from hell. We didn't take the step because we don't want to be with the devil. We came here because we know that God loves us! It is His love that...
Well, then there comes the song which 'pop' to my mind. So there goes...
Ha, while looking at the proposal done by my juniors, I was thinking of PW's proposal and our batch's proposal. And I find it fun to give comments. WTH. Ha, but of course, GB's proposal is easier to edit and format. YAI!
I forgot to talk about the trip in Science Centre. Maybe tonight or later or I don't know when. Other than a few pics, I remembered DaJie remarked that I was very unglam when we played this machine in Science Centre. Oh well, it's me again. Ha...
OK. Firstly, I must thank God that it's isn't OP next week. ? Ha, today I almost lost my voice shouting, commanding using my throats since my adorable girls were very enthusiatic in wanting to learn sizing. Not like that they never touch on it before la, I just don't know why they love it so much. And I relaly clapped my hands when they impressed me with their banging at yangtigi that command. Ha, a DI clapping in front of the girls.
And I took Drug Addict's advise to teach in different order and I really prayed that the girls can remember it better!!
We had fun doing drills today.
I always have the tendency to want to hone their skills before moving on to the next or I will want to re-teach because some girls were absent the previous lesson and never learn. I made the decision of teaching them skills and let them go train themselves several times.
But the trainings doesn't seem to work.
But I know they know what are they supposed to do, it's just a matter of whether they want to put in the heart and willingness or not.
Have the desire and willingness dearest, and then you will improve so much! So what if you may not like drills? Get done with it and then you can forget about it! Of course I stronglyencourage you to train yourself so that you may realise you may like it.
Not like your seniors never come across what you face now.
I forgot to praise one junior.
Oh and I saw someone today again and I lost control, as usual. -.- what a failure, I can't seem to forget this H of AHO. now I finally know where he has been teaching at. lol.
When I had to tell XXX that the guy who hit my head today was 3 years older than me = 20 years old and she was like arh you 17 years old!!, it really hit me so painfully that 17, and dann, next year 18.
Kiki hi5 with me today. lol. And she scared me by walking silently to stop beside me while I was looking at boon-deh, (SM's new hamster) in her cage. It's like I was looking at the hamster then I turned to my left, (oh I was lying on my stomach), Kiki's face was 2cm away from my face, trying to see what SM and I were looking at.
I miss and worry for LYNN. I kinda wonder how is HIPPO. I want to study with SOK again, soon, and take back my blackie. Ha. I am very excited for GB camp. Like super duper excited? if we can have crazy night walk. I feel confused about my choices, uncertain about the future. I just realised, what I see on TV do happen to reality, I just mustered all my courage to admit I have that barrier of trusting and loving someone. I don't miss RX, or maybe I do. I don't know, just bury the past. I really want to spend more time with my PW group members, of course, I doubt they really care ha or my girlish traits are working up. urgg I feel tired for taking up so many jobs and unable to focus but I am not going to give up any. I don't understand why I come to this point. I don't care what the people think when I happily worship the Lord during chapel. I still feel down because I cannot hang out with my SFC people as often as I can. I appreciate having Christian friends around, like really glad to have them. I feel hopeless, yet hopeful too. Ha. I never expect myself to have this strong desire to want to be with belle, WS, SM so much. I didn't know or rather, I didn't realise I am now one who goes, this is right, must go this way. I lied today and I sweared yesterday accidently. I surprised myself by not wanting to do chi.
As a food IC, I am yet wanting to do games more than food. OH YA. Let me share with you what SM and WS did... Anyway ignore emo words
SM, WS, HL
my mum wanted to disown me yesterday (crakles) (stare) WTH she said that and you laughed I didn't mean to! She said it so calmly like... lol I am sorry how dare you! you heartless!!! ha, but today she loves me again (grins) (ws came back with her dinner) WAA, how can I lose to you? OK, I must go buy food since you buy le. SM... Go with me leh! EH! Then leave me here alone. SOBS -.- Ok, then SM what do you want? MacChicken, upsize upsize drink/fries or upsize everything? (laughs) no, MacChicken student meal, if they say upsize say ya (blank look) huh? okok I go (keep looking back they waved I walked back to them) I want fillet student meal YOU THINK I ASAM ARH? LOL (blur look) okok I write down for you (took a paper write down the follwing words Good evening Mdm, what would you like to order? oh fillet student meal? upsize? ya. =.=) (I squated and laughed.When I was about to leave, SM grabbed my shirt and accidently stepped on my slipper so I hopped away. embarassing! and all 3 started LOLing) serious chat by SM and WS aiyo I scared I will be hungry leh (huh, we are having dinner leh, why later still hungry? *iwastryingtolistentothem) Ya lor, I think so too. How ar? Later she takes the food, finishes them then comes back to us telling us that the vendor has no more stock (laugh and puke/ spill some drink) (enlightened) WEI!! (and I slapped SM on her back. apparently they were talking about me being food IC) They sound so serious looked so serious but they were suaning me! urgg.
How ar? I think we won't get to eat MAC too. urggggg seriously. Oh and I reminded SM that this time all of us are taking roles which we never tried. And she said " that's why in previous camp we were never hungry."
I miss the old times, I guess. I have learnt to let go but sometimes I do wish to reenact the old times.
Human nature, ain't it?
SOME toot guy reminded me painfully about something today, something about wasting my resources doing something meaningless.
And I felt like strangling him. Ha
In his stand, he must be wondering why I am doing things wasting my time to do things which benefits me more. These benefits to him maybe what he wanted, but not what I wanted.
And I guess I am him when I 'judge' my friend.
In the bible, somewheeerreeee, there it says not to judge others and something about myself having a plank on my eye commenting on the sand in others' eye. You just didn't know what you have that big piece of thing which makes you blind to the situation you are in. something like, what makes you think you are right? that kinda thing.
Whatever and the next thing I ponder or maybe uncomfortable about is... distance does separates no matter how close the hearts are. It's a inevitable thing.
I really will miss working with my PW group members after this period, they help me to see and learn things which I think others can't help me to.
OUT YOU GO.
OH YA, I am so thankful that I have less burden to carry next year! And I am so glad that I have this DI privilege whereby I can conduct drill test all my own without the supervision of a Mdm. Oh wow, that is superb.
WS shared with the girls so now... she said she saw this girl under 5 singing and shouting worship song in the train. Her mum shhh her trying to avoid stares and annoyed looks.
guess how the little girl responded. =D
ma, don't be shy!
Sometimes, we don't do things we ought to or really want to because we don't want stares and awkwardness but, is that really going to stop you from persuing what you want?
And of course here, I am talking about worshipping etc
but it applies in life. lazy to explain.
How to be happy when you don't get what you want? perhaps, think about things you might get which you never want, and they never happen
??!
I look forward for the upcoming GB camp!!! COOL! I AM THE FOOD IC. Just pray hard your food will arrive safely. =) secret joke.
Ha, that drug addict used my phone and took pictures of her seniors. I didn't realise.
AND MUST tell you. Pastor Ben wanted us to do this activity about communication and first game was to catch as much as you can what your partner shared about her favourite food while you must talk about yours too.
Before we start as what WS said.
WAA, YOURS I MUST WRITE ESSAY!
!!!! raa and the worse thing came after that when we played the second one where A said 1 word, then B start with 1 word, then A, then B...
XXX played with me and her first reaction was like OH DEAR! I HAVE SO MANY THINGS TO WRITE!
OI!!!! YOU! both of you so mean!!! haha
And Pastor Ben reminded WS to write her essay and WS was like ya, a 10page essay.
I stared at WS in bewilderment when she informed me that she told the SQ that I would do sharing since Pastor wasn't around.
!!!
I was eager, YES, eager but !!!
actually parable of talents is at Luke
Haha, I was trembling at heart asking God to guide me as I shared the parable of the sinful woman.
It was great that the message was send to the girls. Value of heart VS actions
Good job! Woosh!
hahaha
can you believe it? nevermind if you don't understand. Thank God! WOOSH.
tattoo lyrics is well written, doesn't apply to me yet though. All thanks to LYNN, it was on her blog ages ago.
Drills was exhausting. I am sure the girls would agree with me. The terrible fact is that, I couldn't move on with what I wanted but they learnt a lot today in drills.
PBB, at the age of 18. I can still go if I want to I heard. Great, A levels next year and...
it's not about studies... I am passionate but passive. A leader is not supposed to be passive but I am.
my dream was DI and I got it. And the DI test was, urgh, giving me nerves and stress.. but the end result was sweet. lol
Did you do it knowingly or not? because if you didn't realise... I was, wondering why.
Life is really beautiful with God. And the joy you can get from Him is more than any joy you had before.
Had a little change in mind just now and now it kinda fades away BUT I will not forget it.
Thank God for sharing with me about Him just now using Judges. I read the 10chapters at one go without knowing it. It felt marvellous though.
And I began to see things differently when I look back. It had been such a long time since I was sec1 where Mr Foo did banana dance enthusiatically during orientation camp fire and those times in 1B classroom, the flokdance night, being vc in sec2, knowing my 'daddy', spouting nonsence when I saw my classroom so orange and dansical performance.
Time flies, things change, people change.
But I decided to let go of the past, like finally?! hah! Praise God!
I wouldn't have been able to do it without Him. Thank God.
It just hit me so much that if I want it, He will give. If I don't want to hold on, there He is, I can give Him. Put it in a funny way, I remember telling my friend - You just put the thing at the foot at His cross then, quickly run away from Him!
Haha, He wouldn't mind anyway, knowing it's for a good cause. =D
And well, I shall study doubly hard, challenge all the negative feelings.
Doubt the girls realise, I didn't share reflection with them today. Thank God haha, because it mine was about spritual discipline, totally different issue from them.
And oh my gosh, I was really happy to see that the girls learnt so much more today, especially from Pastor Ben about gossiping.
and I just realise, when she, you know... that goes to show how gossip can hurt one.
pray hard for my mum's salvation.
anyway anyway anyway, I am really happy that my girls improved pretty much. Haha! BUT, need to be consistent, or improve. Or 2 ways to go.
ok, the girls I mean. Thank God and praise Him for helping us to finish those miserable lines! Actually I don't find them miserable, I actually had the mood to put exclamation marks at our GB motto Seek, Serve and Follow Christ!
I will never forget, 15 pages of lines. And for that I in the shortest time, I told WS I dislike her, 3 times within 1 day, through SMS. And further 5,6,7 times when I saw her. lol.
And I keep telling her that if the girls are not finishing, that's it, I QUIT! haha. well, perhaps for a week. lol
Hope you have learnt from this punishment about time.
And lol, dots dots on the class blog.
I didn't write anything on IR's card and I didn't draw anything!
1 John chapter 2 is another interesting chapter. Can I do one chapter for a week's QT? lol.
white blood cells aren't fighting hard enough. painful.
I MUST PUT THIS ON TOP OF MY POST. SM: Yesterday I slept on my friend's bike, then there was strong wind blowing my hair (with action) Bell: huh, your friend farted?! (burst out laughing)
And I wasn't listening to them and they said something and ended up laughing even louder for both.
I:what is it?? Bell: hahas, I heard that (laughs), she slept on her friend's butt,(laughs) then there was great wind! (LOLs)
And oh well, the 3 of us laughed like mad woman. Esp that Bell who had bad sore throat, had to laugh differently to lessen the hurt on her throat. And her laughter, lol.
And SM continued saying it smelt like durain. LOL!
She meant it, because thebike went pass the durain store! HA!
SM, I don't want to post Kiki's pictures le, they are all too dark. lols. MAYEE YOU are super random! Haha. as in the avril thing lols
I went to study,(supposedly) at SM's house and Kiki was there! Haha, oh my gosh... I hate fleas. SM tried to let me hear the sound of the breaking of shells when she killed the fleas. DISGUSTING! Haha.
Everytime I see Kiki I will asl stupid questions.
Why Kiki is sometimes emo sometimes high ar? aren't you like that too? what qns lol! dots
Kiki kept stepping on my toe! ARH! And that SM enjoyed it so much! EVIL! Once Kiki was on sofa, and SM threw its toy on the floor, Kiki jumped down onto my foot in persue of the toy. urgg.
And better still, kiki stepped on almost every part of me. LOL. I meant it. My gosh! Sickening. Haha(pun pun)
Somehow, yesterday I found one thing that is similar between Kiki and me(not that I am a bitch tho), it seeks for warmth. She desires to be with somebody. Everytime she saw a new person, she wants to build friendships and show that person that s/he is a friend in her eyes! Me too! Haha.
I especially love it when Kiki lies beside me, sat on me, rest behind me. sweet. I could feel it's presence, as in, really touching it. It's different from sensing someone who is around you.
Poor eng
NEH-MIND. LOL
After bathing with Rhon(lols) in school, SM and I went to pick Belle and went to TP. temasek poly!
The performance was great! Put up by the dance and production crew, the performance was hot, sexy and lively! (and hit me so much that JC=no live)(but I am still glad I am in JC because, it's SA where God.. you know. =) ) And oh my gosh! cute guys! LOL!!!! Okok, I wasn't there to gnaw at the guys.
It should have started at 7.30pm but there was tech problems and on the curtains, the words were "no show". lols. Yet, instead of feeling a waste of time or irritated, the audience cheered and gave heaps of encouragment. Then we see "input 1" "input 2" and the video started then yada yada.
Allow me to be mean here, I was really amazed by the.. fat people. MEAN! Okok, as in, there were a few girls who were overweight but they could catch up with the beats in Hip-Hops etc. Gosh! And they were couragious, their sexy moves would not turn you off, well not neccessarily up either but hello, they were cool!
Personally, I love the dance where the dancers entered in white suits and dresses. The theme for that dance was about love and... well... it was beautiful.
Belle and SM was excited by the popping. lols.
They may not be the best dancers but compared to many, they are so much better. Like how one of the speaker said, they are carefree, and passionate and do not care about what others said, they just dance! the performance reflected how much effort and spirit and heart they had put in. And well, I am awed by their strong passion. Good job! Haha. and as for yesterday drills.. each time I have drills section with the girls, I have different thoughts and joy Haha, nothing beats during breaks, having girls to stand in position and goes "STAFF SERAGANT! CAN YOU GIVE US COMMAND?!"
HAHA! I WAS SO HAPPY LA! HAHA! well, things are flowing well although.. slow but, I can definitely see that, after months of going wrong and correcting, the girls are picking the skills as in... I don't know. what I can see now, they have the desire to learn and hone their skills. Isn't that cool?! lols. actually, if you realise, I am still commanding using my throat and that's why I cough and you know, my command sounds weird after a few mintues. Then when I saw the girls wanting to do better, I tried to use diaphram(SM, correct spelling?) Look at how impactful those little girls are. so cute =)
oh well, my timing still sound so much better than my command. Ee.
Maybe well, in the eyes of a perfectionist, they haven't reach there yet, but they are on their way. That sense of assurance...woo! Haha.
And I saw ZX scolding NCC yesterday.. watching him I almost bang into a wall. retard. nah, that similar scene I saw 4 years ago, when we were, very close.big SIGH.
lols, I am here wanting to talk about Job23 but arh lalala I don't know what to say... the first few verses was, arh they just speak that I thought but... there must be more
even today my complaint is bitter His hand is heavy in spite of my groaning It's like... He knows that He wants me to do many things which I don't like to or, I have no wish to but He still wants me to do. And it's like, I feel as though being a Christian is such a tough life. But then, it's in Job23. He knows. He knows I will think so, and yet He still wants me to do it. I was pondering if I must do something I don't like where can I find joy? but come to think of it, the process may be hard, but the fruits will be sweet. Hasn't He been showing that?
but He knows the way I take when He has tested me, I will come forth as gold He speaks alot in my life. I don't like it. Haha, but lol... lol lol
And suddenly I was thinking, I can say I believe in Him but not yet faith. like oh my gosh what is happening? stumble and stumble... is it because I am young I stumble more oftens.. ok like a baby..
okok, I still yearn for the Lord. no prob.
Phillipians4:13 have been stuck with me for very long
arh lalala. tough times at homes tough times in school. sheesh!
TEDDY BEAR, I ate you ytd. LOL.
yesterday, when I brought bread and peanut butter from the NTUC... gosh, I felt like an auntie! in GB shirt and school skirt. aiyo, like mother for the kids.
but they finished the 600g bread. Haha, I don't understand how they made my day so easily. sheesh!
kids. kids. and kiki. all Ks. LOL!
OH I SAW FISH!!!! I WAS SO DOLEFUL!!! FISH!!!! Haha, walau, and he still remembered FACIAO la, haha, I was a bit embarassed. lols. Jasper looked so smart in white uniform ok,(simply love guys in uniform. miss ZJ then LOL!) post the pic next time. =) And, Fish made me looked shorter in the picture. raa! JASPER!!! I miss him so much!
Haha, the better news is that I did my quiet time after 2 days of starving myself of spritual food.
Each time I do my QT, I feel that He is speaking to me. This sounds dumb but ya, it felt great knowing that He in heaven spoke to me!
And He brought me to Ecc 8. That chapter was fantastic. Most importantly, it reasoned out why I should maintain my joy. In fact, I must thank someone who listened me out of during one of the nights. Thank you! really! almost die without you online! hahahaha
I am so not going to talk about anything during GB farewell dinner without the pictures. IT WAS TERRIBLY GREAT! DANN! Even Lai Yan's batch came!!!!!!! MY GOSH!!!! I was euphoric!!!!
They were sec4s when I was in sec1 la!!!
And I led worship. Really, I thank God for, you know, making WS comeing out with this idea, pull me along and gave me opportunity to do. Maybe not in SA because I am so shy but, aiya, it just felt wonderful!!
And JEANIE AND SHER WAS THERE TOO! Things were really crazy. Even photos taking.
Apart from the worship, the VESPER was HORRIBLY GREAT. LOL. (it's my habit in using negative with positive words, bare with me. haha) WHEN THE '04 SEC4S TO '08SEC1S STOOD IN CONTINGENT, GAVE GOOD BANG AND SANG VESPER!!!! The bang, maybe I didn't contribute to because I was in black socks, (long story, some ppl violetly pull off my shoes b4 that) and some were in heels, slippers, shoes etc but haha, we did a SOLID BANG!
My gosh.... Come on man!
And today we, oh hold it, yesterday, yea, we maked the end and had a start : POP&ENROLLMENT service.
haha, wow, the CCA room was so so so small yet it fit us very well. Oh ya, Pastor Ben's whole family came! ZOE SO CUTE!!! ARH! I WANT TO BRING HOME LA, then Pastor Ben rejected because Zoe is his princess. sniffs I understand. SHE IS SO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my gosh, but haha, she is very girly. And the youngest son is a mixture of Zak and Zoe. A boy who looks like Zac but more tamed like Zoe.
Kids. urggg
MY GOSH, elva new song, that lyrics fits me well. Haha. right. anyway, time to get more Elva songs
While reading out the Girls' Brigade Laws and Promise for Miss Leong to type, I felt a new sense of... no, it's like I renew my GB membership.
When the sec1s declared their promise, I asked WS if I could recite with them too. Well, she merely replied You are old.
lols.
YA. We recited the NCOs and it felt... everything came and fall into places.
I used one Law to counter attck WS when she was horrible. Haha, Be kind, cheerful and COURTEOUS.
And the Law on Promtly obey the orders of Officers the ends of our lips curled up, smiling gleefully.
Guess that's more or less about it. so many things to say but...
I would take 6 mircrosoft words pages. so ya, haha! just wish the girls had a great times like we do. =)
And may God be pleased for I am filled with joy and I hope God does too. Haha! oh well, met SU's thai friends, they are very nice ppl man. Haha. OH YA, I forgot to talk about counsellor commendation.
I was awed. HORRIBLE awed. I, no, SFC could feel God's presence so heavily, no so closely to us in the St Andrews Cathderal.
And I was afraid that the vow they made to God, as in it was a vow, since God led them here, I am sure they will do according to what they have vowed.
I was quite upset despite expecting it, I guess He wants me to focus on GB more, with the upcoming GB drills comp next year. And unfortunately, about the trip to New Zealand next year which without subsidy cost more then $2 triple O, I may not make it for my lion will have it's teeth into my jangular. (forget the spelling) I want it, a lot. But first... GB comp! My gosh!
The more I build my relationship with Him, the more I feel like a stranger in my family. And this feels terrible, for which child on the Earth was born to feel this way towards their parents?
I finally found the similarity between us. We all have the tendency to give it all without thought, or maybe we did. Give it all. And we spend those time like how we wanted, we forget about the things that may happen. When they did, we lost it. any relationships. friends. etc etc. ya know
As usual, my post will be all about me. I am making as S out of U and ME. lols. if you don't get it. ASSume
Oh well. sorry Lord.
That's why I never want to give it all. God knows how painful you feel, God knows what you are going through and I don't. All I know is, as a person who lack the sense of security, who protects herself at all times, make sure she doesn't get hurt.
And I am afraid I will naive-ly? give it all. The last thing I want is to end up with the similar stituations.
In fact, the really last thing I want, is for you to join them. You are like them to me alright, freaking important. And as a very selfish person, I only can see that when you pain, I pain too.
AND I loathe that.
but I guess, no matter what says, I can't change the plans God have for you. You are the last person whom carries so much and have great influence to me after them, so, the freaking vital advise for me to give you is, commit your decision to God. Do not act for yourself, but act by His way. For you and I are clear, He will never hurt us.
so easy to gain my trust, so hard at the same time too.
That's why now I am taking it slowly. This noon I just done something which, never appears in my mind even seconds before I was there. I just did, even less. I am freaking trying to control myself, pardon me. I wanted to have dinner with you la! Haha. forget it. I don't want my history to happen again. arh, the much I wish to give, I am scared that you won't want it. I AM SO PROUD OF MY DAJIE!!!! hahahah!!! =D WOOOO! DAJIE ROCKS! HAHAHA!
shhhh lols.
I scolded the girls today for the first time in my life. Oh my gosh. They never realise, Hui Ling this senior is actually a serious person too! I asked Vaness is it that I always joke with you all so much that you all find me funny and think that I am more of funny kind? And, you probably know the answer. Then I scolded the girls. I don't know. Someone commented that I don't fit to scold because, it was weird. haha.! Yea, true. And when I punish them, I feel that I am cruel. but,
I think, we want them well. isn't it?
Haha. First and maybe the last. For all I know, today they really were too much. for the changing of full-u.
Oh ya, and I can't really scold, I will let anger take over me, I will torture people. That's why I always try to be gentle with you... yea. I think, one WS is enough la huh. Haha. well, back to my honey-sweet, LOL, crappy, greedy senior la huh. Haha.
DRUG ADDICT!!!! Haha, my class went to central nacrotics la and I instantly thought of you leh DRUG ADDICT! AIYA, see la, now you have high fever. Aiyo, I miss you leh drug addict. ahahahha.
I think I can handle the song le. Haha, pre-eminese of Christ. playing guitar seems cool. Haha. but I still prefer drums. urgg.
in every thing I do, every word that I say let Your light shine though me in everyway Lord of life I give to You, all that I have and ever hope to be My master, be glorified in me.
That B notes, kills man! hahah.
for all I know, I am always too much.
I FORGOT! I SAW MY CURRENT!!! oh well, she called me asking me to go help her in CIP, by buying lollipops sold by her. food. sheesh
sometimes, I really ponder over why so I have patience in waiting for you sometimes, I wonder why do I love you despite not knowing you I am always giving chances, I don't flare at you, I don't snap at you You are young, you have great ambitions, you have great desires those are good, of course I am more than happy that you actually wrote that those that can't prevent the ugly lines you had earlier to appear in my mind just hope that during your stay in GB, will develop you well and you will gain so much from it may you success in everything you do
As mentioned, there, the pictures I managed to take during street market. CHOCOLATTI is our shop name! I still keep the banner la, lols, so that we can hang it in our class next year? See how first.
Talking about that reminded me that I missed 3 buses because they were all full. Bus 966. Sheesh!
Our first try using the machine was terrible. The chocolate simply... looked horrible and it kinda solidify and we had to throw them. High loss.
The second time we tried was better and the chocolate flowed smoothly. lols. Customers flowed in too and the class began to put in more effort. They even came out with the idea of using hot water to melt chocolate. fill a pot with hot water then put a smaller pot of choc in that big pot.
Josh tried to squeeze hats and put on masks for those who were dealing with the food. lols.
just realise I don't have the mood to talk about it
Anyway, girls are so typical. There was a Saints Idol competition amid the street market. A guy, supposedly well-known in SA for being the cute guy. Well, undeniably, he is cute. AND the girls went wild! oh my gosh!
When he started singing, his supporters stood up and cheered etc.
etc etc
He became the idol. not a surprise. lols. I just question the people voted for his vocals or his look. can't really stand people who go googoo gaga over cute guys. lols.
His singing... not bad la huh.
WAaaAA. that daJIE, he said the wrong stuff THRICE within 2 days! ARH! I want to bash him le. Hahahahahsss.
Haaaaaaa
Thursday I met SM at BP! WOO! Haha! Great! We went to look at the CDs, once again I had hard time deciding to spend or not. I searched high and low for night of the museum. but they don't have. sighs.
Anyway we went to the second floor and there were offers! S.H.E disc seeling at $5! MY Gosh! I don't know whether I should bash them or grab them. (different thems)
Waa. tempting. then SZESZE appeared! WOO! Haha.
Eh before that... SM fed me fries (ehlols) and I rejected her several times because I was having cough. I gave up in the end.
Anyway ya then she said something and I thought she wanted to offer me again so I swung my hand at her telling her it's ok (or?) and walked away from her.
Turns out that she was asking for a drink from me! LOLS. so paiseh la!
bought the ecxorism(whatever the spelling) of emily rose. =)
SM wanted a jacket so we went into this shop. WAA, I wanted to get one so that I could wear it during exams in the hall. (tho I have more than one at home. was thinking only) And out of, craziness? I told them that I wanted to get track pants and wear that for exams.
LOL. crazy!
Imagine, me wearing full u, with tracks pants, let's add a jacket with hood. lols!
We kinda combed the shop. I was empty handed ok, without carrying any bag etc but the 2 shop assistants sandwiched me, no, and sze and SM, thinking that we might steal their stuff. Funny ar! I was wearing sch skirt and saints shirt, sze was in PJ u.... DOTS.
I bet, my forehead must have printed I am going to steal. catch me.
seriously. -.- dots
Did we go crazy in the library? I don't remember leh... It was like sze and I went after SM... who stopped to sit down at this place with the I-am-here-to-sit-only look. Waa! The library was chilling cold and she wanted to sit down so bring us there?! lols.
arh! feel like I am not myself today.
have a little bit of reforms in GB today. tho I supported it, I find myself abit slow in following. The S factor (as in DISC) begins to act up. resistent to changes.
OH YA! WS GOT THE PBB BADGE!!!!!! Haha! She was so overwhemled with joy! Haah!
Congrats crazy woman! =)
hahas. Finally... we got the the highest badge a girl can ever achieve... here in 50th company! Woots! Haha.
I am really, intoxicated with joy (think I used the word wrongly, lols) for the us achieving all these. like... you know... pbb
leaders. every girl a leader, every officer a servant leader.
Everyone has different working styles, now all I wish is to guild and help them along to find their leadership styles. Well, I am not in the tip-top position to do it, but that is now my aim. And of course... witness of the Lord.
The only thing is that... I am finding these abit to fast for me to adapt.
or...
I think my faith is shaken. dann. I need to find the light again. Why do I like to fall so much?
I can see that silly girl wants to share her joy with us VERY MUCH. haha, I try to go to P&D ok... wow, how I miss that, promotion and dedications ceremony. I very much want to cheer like mad when the slides shows 50th company - Teo Wei Shan but... that will be my third time rejecting Evelyn's invitation for her cell meeting.
How?
Haha. I am supposed to be very jealous you know... but I am not. I am very happy because... He is bringing you back. lols.
I don't know... just awed...
loads of love woman ;)
listening to BoA's song again.
I am finding myself straying away.. it's so difficult to LISTEN to His words, even the songs... tough
where have I done wrong and place myself in this state?
anyway... what a mix. todays post is so messy!
That Drug addict ar... Her handbag. lols, holEy! Haha! And the strap was very thick la. the first time I carry it, no when I was sitting on the floor, it slipped off my shoulders as though it was my bra strap. dots.
I am horribly slow today... when Captain said that she went to GB blog thorugh my blog... I replied etc, took me 2 mintues to realise, she read my blog. and you know the WHAT?! goes on...
And SM told me something... took me another lone minute to realise that she was shooting me or something? Dots!
don't remember anything le.
cus I still don't understnad why I am feeling so lost.
learn how to lead worship... God I need you back in my life to fill me up with You then I can do it isn't it?
You are always faithful but why do I feel like... You are not here?
God... What is it that I have not?
need you in my life....
know what... if monday there is a class outing... and tuesday, school day, her birthday... I can't go wish her... anyway... I still question if it's approprate to... do I call it.. happy birthday?
there will be... just movie... and a small-scale game. either run in the mall or within an area. Hehs.
Sok. Thank you! I LOVE YOU dearest! seeing you never fails to brighten my day!
AND HOW CAN I FORGET?! I SEE MY HOT, WONDERFUL, FAVOURTIE PHYSICS TEACHER LLL!!!!! HAHA! MISS LIM! AND I HUGGED HER!!!! MY GOSH!!!!!!!!!
I MISS HER SOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!!
sobs sobs sobs!!! I want to cry! too touching le! Haha!!! arh!!! I miss her so much!!!!!!!!!!
arh! I still can't imagine.... from the state where WS and I in parade square would niii niii na na about her... actually fall in love with her! Haha!
seriously... you can't believe... what we talked about her last time.. haha, not those mean type.. just.. very qian bian stuffs. ahha. who cares....
all I know I am blinded by the passion from her and my love for her.
Love - how great? it can make you to do things, unknowingly.
ha. I love Miss Lim Leck Lee! waa, juniors! please treat her nicely k!!! Haha!!! L cube rocks my life! haha
lols, BoA's song NO.1 keeps ringing in my head... you are still my number one
I am tired, because my passion is not being shared here. I am tired because it looks like I have to forsaken my desires.
I am, very attached to GB. Haha, eh I think through my blog you can learn a lot about me leh.
Dots. kk, it will be my diary.
I had a chat with someone just now. That person is someone whom influence me a lot. I don't deny that I feel very attached to her when we are friends.
Did God send her into my life? We shared about our walk with God, and once again she is different from the previous time when she told me she wanted a simple life and so she chose to walk that road. She hoped that I would not be affected and I reassured her that I would not, in fact I wait for her to be back again.
Whatever it is, she put the thoughts I had into words which make it clearer to me. GB. Why do I want to go back so much? My answer was to equip the girls thoroughly with drills skills. However, she emphasized that it was because of Him. Isn't it?
YES. I want to serve God. Knowing that I can't serve Him though Church, I jumped at every opportunity to serve God. That is why I took SFC.
When I go for SFC meetings, it hit me that I wanted to bring God's word to my company. Nonetheless, that slipped out of my mind when I see the girls. No wonder, I always find that, teaching it right or not, I am not satisfied.
I even wanted to suggect to SFC that maybe we can bring God's words to GB/BB and come up with activities.
Then I realise, that is what I wanted for MY OWN company itself.
I used to hate HQ so much. I really did, I couldn't stand the sight of the Mdms, the companies which behaved like HQ which handles things so weirdly. I even hated the smell of HQ. Come to think of it, they have their reasons in doing so.
Don't you find GB set aparts themselves well? Not that in Kranji!
The motto of GB is, to seek, serve and follow Christ and the aim was to see girls to be followers of Christ and thorugh self-discipline, with a sense of responsibility...
I don't remember the other words.
Look, that's what GB all about.
GB meetings are supposed to include drills, games, badgework and devotion. Have we forgotten our basic, foundations, roots?
I support the idea of changing our company to be more like HQ. If other companies, (ok, like this particular company with non-christians), can bring God's word and even believe and follow them so much, and are successful, why can't we?
Has the heart of following the world, chasing and persuing success, derailed us from seeing what's planned for us/ what we really want to do?
Believe in God or not, I think that is one thing to consider.
Why did I wrote those? crap. hahas.
I desire for money. I desire for clothes. I desire for beauty. I desire for his heart. (like all girls do) but they are not God's desires.
Am I willing to give up my desires up and picked up the cross and follow Christ? No. but I try.
Oh I understand why I ask that question le! Haha. think about it la. I think...
I am going crazy. Haha!
if it's the old me, I will go walau eh! What's with this person man? so religious. why must she make herself go through so much? always do things for God. He is the answer. Not influenced by by fellow-silbing, not influenced by WS, but by God's word, who swept my feet off. Haha.
he too... for all I know, he, carries a very heavy weightage in my heart. dann it.. sheesh!
pray hard. I shall go to see their NDP's training. Who knows? Maybe I get the chance to give commands to whole UGs?! LOL! Waaa, if that happen I will be so damn happy I might jump jump JUMP off the second floor accidently. lols. eh so cool ar!!!!!! My gosh. Haha..
All that Xia Chen's fault, of he last year didn't sour me for getting to be the marker, the person who gives command to pandan kekan-nan the contigents while they march off.
lols. what am I crapping?
just now saw Kiki!!! I felt that she is more tame today. or actually, you seems emo. Why? Haha. Nvm, ya I don't like Kiki. I don't think so, but I feel attached to it leh... haha... =D. but just now kiki very cute. smiles*
I WANT A DOG! Haha.
And shall name it xiao.. nah. LOL!!!!
no NANAs!. daJIE reminded me something. haha.
kk, AND THAT LYNN! SHE... raa! Hahaha, so what if he was near to you? I don't care le. Haha... but I miss him a lot. my sweet, sour, bitter daddy.
really a lot, when I think of him.
you linger in my mind
oh dear, just realise I started with such a random sentence. BoA's songs are nice!!! woots!
oh, street market. great. the start was horrible. talk about it tml.
Hui Ling 040491
really really wants 'Marrying Mozart'
Matthew 17:20 He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
As mentioned, there, the pictures I managed to take during street market. CHOCOLATTI is our shop name! I still keep the banner la, lols, so that we can hang it in our class next year? See how first.
